bird poops on plum branch

buster


Buster Benson

No advice column.


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locking myself up
bird poops on plum branch
buster
I always forget how much I enjoy days where I don't see or talk to anyone. Where, from waking up to going to sleep I live in my own world of projects, song snippets, daydreams, self-criticisms, ambitions, insecurities, and games. Today I played a game related to eating. I have a difficult time NOT finishing a meal. If there's food in front of me and it's designated as "mine" I feel this almost obsessive need to eat it all... it goes back to the childhood rule of having to clean my plate in order to be excused from the table I'm assuming. But now I think it is an unhealthy thing. I don't feel FULL until I feel ILL. It's silly how strong this compulsion in me is. But today I had a delicious plate of stir-fried vegetables and chicken in oyster sauce over white rice. Yum. And I forced myself to eat slowly, and stop when I was full rather than when I felt sick. I think I ate a few bites too many (I couldn't pass up the last broccoli or mushroom) but overall left without feeling sick. Then I realized how novel that feeling is. And it felt good. How weird to discover that you have some kind of demented eating disorder (hidden all these years by my high metabolism). But I would like to lose a couple pounds so this will be a new game to play. Whenever I spend a day alone like this, something like this surfaces. How little I know about myself.

I spent the rest of the day working on little projects and sending Odeo voice messages to all the people I could find that I knew on there. And researching Toastmasters (there might be one during lunch hour near work). And making plans and more plans. And getting interesting snippets of news from Las Vegas (where I lost $100 on black, remotely). And reading everything I can about that crazy shooting in Capitol Hill (which, strangely, The Stranger has the best coverage of... simply by being the most adept at using the Internet to research the people and the bulletin boards and the events involved). Reading myspace profiles of the victims is rather haunting.

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and i thought i was special. odeo floozy!

we're all special in the eyes of the frog lord.

the frog lord's been captured on mars 9.

quick call the duck, maybe he can rescue him while he's there?

you're really not very good at comprehension, are you/? the duck was captured too!@!@32

Did you get the odeo I sent? I wasn't sure it worked.

Re: Did you get my odeo?

Yeah, I replied almost instantly with a "yes"... in any case, this is my now belated yes.

Re: Did you get my odeo?

I never got it! I blame Ruby. (Not really)

I'll follow up tonight!

Re: Did you get my odeo?

Odeo's been acting a little weird. I blame sound... such a flaky api.

you never sent me a reply odeo. :'(

i did! it looks like odeo is having troubles though... that's the second time my odeo replies haven't been sent. also, all my phone posts are still "in the tube" as they say.

Fix it!

I am getting so fat. I think when we go out for dinner we should consider sharing a plate. Except not tomorrow. :)

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